Monday, May 9, 2016

1XL Is The Loneliest Number

Most of my t-shirts come with one modest 'X.' But the biggest hoodie I own comes with five. It's a huge, navy-blue cotton army-tent of a thing. It actually pre-dates my relationship with my wife, and it started out being hers. We both like(d) mondo hoodies. The more X's the better. I have all my wife's hoodies now, and I wear almost all of them. I'm so glad we got 'em big. 

Big hoodies feel like medieval cloaks to me, like a way to hide my devious thoughts in plain sight. I like all my clothes baggy, if I can have my way. You'll never see me wearing a pear of scrotum-squeezing skinny-leg jeans, regardless of those idiots claim to be fashion. I'm glad that my wife agreed, because now I have mementos of her love that I can wear. It makes me smile every time I put one on, even if that smile is on the inside.

I have no problem admitting to wearing my dead wife's clothes, although certainly not all of her clothes. I've never found bras that flattering on me, and I certainly wouldn't wear her panties without a matching bra. But her hoodies are a daily comfort. I am not looking forward to summer. It'll be too hot for hoodies.


PS. If you were following my cat Wolfie's illness, I finally heard back regarding the last of the blood work and he's fine. Bit anti-climactic, I know, but if you really wanna know more, fill out the feedback form and I'll tell you all about the urine and feces tests!

2 comments:

  1. So glad to hear Wolfie is doing well. I imagine he has washed like mad the last few days to get the "vet smell" gone and the "home smell" back in place.

    Under the heading of xxxl clothing ... I sized down my husband's size 13 wedding ring to size 7.5 so I could wear on my right hand. It feels right to wear.

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    Replies
    1. He's been bathing like mad, and it seems that my other cat has started to reel in the 'tude about it was well.

      That's a lovely way to carry a memento around all the time. I haven't got the funds to resize anything, but I wear her engagement and wedding bands on a necklace every day.

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