"It was her time" and other bullshits

There's a lot of awful cliches in grief:

"They're in a better place."

"The universe wouldn't give you more than you can handle."

"Everything happens for a reason."

Some are actually helpful, like:

"He that conceals his grief finds no remedy for it." - Turkish proverb

"You cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building nests in your hair." - Chinese proverb

"Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break." - some guy named Bill

When I was fresh in grief, it felt monstrous, inhuman, utterly impossible to exist but somehow, there it was. Turns out, grief is as old as humanity, and as normal. It pissed me off how much people had cliches coming out their mouths, noses and ears. But when I started sorting the good from the bad, I realized where it's all coming from at least. This has all happened before; it will all happen again. I can say, I finally see "the wisdom of the ages" in a way relevant to my life. This is why they say to listen to your elders and all that bullshit.

Turns out I'm not the only person to ever lose the person they loved most in the world. It's been happening for thousands of years, folks. Surprised? I kind of was. I'm still going to refer to Google as my lore-keeper and guru in all things modern. But with grief, I'm hungry to hear from those who've been adrift in these waters before. Grief is as old as smiling when you're happy and laughing at farts. I'm glad to know my grief's not unique as it feel. I try to find words to talk about grief in this blog: C.S. Lewis already wrote the freakin' book.